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Location: Mumbai, Maharashtra, India

Senior Assistant Editor, The Times of India newspaper

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

Bush appoints Kerry Vice President

United States President George W Bush today appointed Senator John Kerry Vice President.

The appointment came shortly after Vice President Dick Cheney was admitted to hospital due to breathlessness.Bush's action is being seen as media analysts as heartwarming after Bush defeated Kerry in the recent President election by a narrow margin.

The election had nearly divided the United States of America.

Kerry, in an exclusive but very brief chat with The Spoof over the telephone, admitted that he had been invited by Bush to be Vice President and he had graciously accepted the offer.

Kerry is likely assume office 'shortly' according the top White House sources.

With Kerry's appointment, the United States of America will demolish all global misconceptions that it is a divided nation.

As a payback, Kerry is expected to toe the Bush line.

Cheney was not available for comment. His family said they were not authorized to comment.

Doctors were unwilling to comment on his illness, except state that he was admitted following breathlessness.

Cheney has had a history of heart attacks.

Bush had met British Prime Minister Tony Blair recently and had apparently discussed this possibility with him.

Blair is said to have immediately agreed to Bush's plan to appoint Kerry as Vice President.Other world leaders have also welcomed Kerry's appointment as Vice President.

The Presidents of France, Germany, Italy, South Africa, China, India, Sri Lanka and Fiji were among a long list.

One of Bush’s strongest critics, filmmaker Michael Moore, also welcomed Kerry’s appointment.

He told The Spoof, that with Kerry’s appointment, he would give up plans to make a sequel to his Fahrenheit 9/11.In a breaking news development, Al Jazeera reported that Al Qaeda leader Osama bin Laden had also welcomed Kerry’s appointment as Vice President of the United States of America.

He told the television channel that he would now pledge to give up violence and assured the US that he would not launch any attack on it.

Sources close to former Iraqi leader Saddam Hussein said he would be freed shortly after Kerry assumed office as an act of goodwill. Hussein is likely to be returned charge of his country, but under strict US supervision.Kerry has pledged him billions of dollars in aid if he behaved himself, the sources added.


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